The first thing you probably want to know is

“What is this Zombie Pizza! Token that came in the box and how do I use it to dominate my friends and/or make them laugh?”

zombie pizza token

Ok, so chill out for a second and we will address this pressing question before we even get into how the game works.  Here you go:

The Zombie Pizza! token sits quietly at the center of the table until everyone has at least 1 Talent card in play. Then it goes live. The person with the least cards in hand may shout “Zombie Pizza!” and snatch it like a mongoose. If you control the Token at the start of your turn, shout “Zombie Pizza!” to draw an extra card from the Main Deck, OR take Blood, Guts, or Brains from the Bank. During game play, the token transfers to the player with the least cards in hand, provided that player is on the ball and shouts “Zombie Pizza!” and snatches it like a mongoose. If two or more players are tied for the least cards, obviously the faster one gets it.

Onward.

Here are some basic picture instructions for Americans who hate reading.

And here are some more specific instructions, that entail the deciphering of actual words.

What follows is a copy of the Instructions that come with the game.  They are printed on the large, folded piece of paper that you threw in the garbage because it was not brightly colored and had too many words on it.  Do not skip the section that pertains to Gary Busey.

Big in Canada.

During the first year of its release, Zombie Circus Goats outsold soft drinks, antibiotics, and window tinting in Canada. 1

Thanks Canadians!zombie circus goats big in canada

If Bridge and Mahjong are your favorite games, Zombie Circus Goats will make you weep bitter tears.  On the other hand, this is the game Gary Busey played for 3 days straight in the back of a Winnebago.  It’s the game Leonard Cohen wrote the song Suzanne about.

If you need more laughing, trading, slapping, and bleating in your life, Zombie Circus Goats is here to help.

Really, really ridiculously good looking.

Zombie Circus Goats is full of roguishly handsome cards that will make you spurn your other games and use them for non-entertainment purposes such as lighting fires.

So if you find yourself gazing at The Bearded Man or Moira & Soira, thinking they were made for you, it’s okay.

You’re an odd person, for sure, but you’re not wrong.  The whole game was made for you.

Excellent stats.

Zombie Circus Goats requires exactly 6% more brain power than War, Crazy 8’s, Russian Roulette, or any the various word-matching/sentence-completion games.  In return, it offers 432% more strategy.

zombie circus goats bill and twins

 

87 out of 100 people can play Zombie Circus Goats while scarfing down nachos, sipping a beverage, and soapboxing about their favorite show.

zombie circus goats game of thrones riff

Friends who play ZCG together have 58% more laughter, 73% more slapping, and 3000% more pointless debates in their lives.

 

extremely happy birthday zombie circus goats

 

 

Rebuild game night.  Better than before.  We have the technology.

zombie circus goats flag

 

 

 

 

  1. Johnson, Ringo. “American Card Game Holds Key to Total Economic Recovery.” New Canada Times 12 Jan. 2020: 1. Print.